Ecclesiastes 3:4b ...a time to laugh...
In honor of Family Fun Month
Mom logic: If you fall out of that tree and break your legs don't come running to me!
When I was a kid, I had a disease that required me to eat dirt three times a day. Luckily my brother discovered it and helped me stay on track with the cure.
Families are like fudge, mostly sweet with a few nuts.
My sister thinks she's so smart. She said onions are the only food that makes you cry. I threw a coconut at her and proved her wrong.
In honor of National Golf Month
The safest place to stand when I hit a golf ball is directly in front of me.
After they went into the locker room, another golfer who had heard the old guys talking about their game went to the pro and said, "I've been playing golf for a long time and thought I knew all the terminology of the game, but what's a rider?" The pro said, "A rider is when you hit the ball far enough to actually get in the golf cart and ride to it."
In honor of Peach Month
Why did Princess Peach choke? Because Mario came down the wrong pipe.
My friend handed me a peach. I told him I prefer pears so he handed me another one.
In honor of National Sandwich Month
(Have you ever said this? I have.)
"Mom, make me a sandwich."
"Poof, you're a sandwich."
Every time I go to my favorite restaurant I order the club sandwich. I've been doing this for years and I'm not even a member.
(This one made me laugh out loud.)
Me: The kids haven't eaten their sandwiches.
Wife: Ok, just throw them out.
Me (helping the kids pack a suitcase): Look I'm as surprised as you are.
Tell a Joke. Make someone laugh today.
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